When I first started flying I had little knowledge of the outside world. I was raised in the Bible Belt, in an extremely fundamentalist religious family. Yes, I had waited on tables during my high school years. I got fired from one job because I didn't know how to handle men who drank too much. From then on I worked in Family type restaurants- no alcohol! There was no alcohol in my family experience, except for the wine at my Nonna's house! Needless to say, I was as green as they came! Understand, I think there's nothing wrong with this type of upbringing- but it is very cloistered! Any social life was with members of our church! No dancing, no movies in my family!
Keep that in mind as I tell you this story.
I was flying on a Dc-9, don't remember where. I only remember we sat in an empty aircraft for a while, waiting for the time passengers would board. I had gone to the cockpit to see if the pilots wanted anything. As I leaned forward to ask for their orders my dark curly hair fell a bit forward. The Captain looked at the First Officer, grinned, and said "Wouldn't you love to see that beautiful hair on your pillow?!" I stood up and gasped, and left the cockpit.
I then went into the front galley, pulled the curtain, and began to cry! Since I never got the beverage order the Captain came out of the cockpit and entered the galley to get coffee. He asked "What's Wrong! Why are you crying?!" I said in a weepy voice that I must have given them the impression I was "That" kind of girl!
For a moment the Captain just stood there with his mouth hanging open- probably in shock. He took me to a seat, sat me down, and had a talk.
This is what he told me:
"First, don't take anything we say seriously! We get bored! We like to joke, kid around! We mean no disrespect! Sure, there's a few playboys who chase after every skirt. But treat them like they are joking and they will move on! Where were you raised, in a closet?!"
"If you take everything to heart you'll never make it in this industry!! Just laugh and treat those comments as a joke. I was just implying that you have beautiful hair! It was a compliment!! Got it?"
I thanked him for his advise. We talked a bit about my upbringing. Later I found out my Nickname among some of the pilots was "The Nun"!
I got it. Whether it was crew members or passengers, compliments, come-ons, and off colored jokes were all taken with a grain of salt!
It was one of those defining moments of "growing up a bit"! Looking back I realize I probably was in culture shock! Ha! But I survived!
And I was and am grateful for the Fatherly advise from that Captain who took a moment or two to teach me the ropes!
The little girl from Iowa who desperately wanted to see the World stuck with it and did just that!
Until next time, Dear Readers!
Remember! Life Is Indeed An Adventure, And Each Day Can Be A Learning Experience!
4 comments:
If that comment was made today, the female flight attendant would have that pilots job. I am now sure if it is a good thing or not. I totally believe in women’s rights but sometime think maybe...just maybe we are too pc these days. I don’t know. You?
Dear Unit 501- Thank you for your comment! I think there's a big difference in a casual comment and "Sexual Harassment". Unwanted, uninvited touching is a big no-no. But let's not get carried away. For a man to put his hand on your arm or small of the back as you walk through the door is Not something to get upset about! A compliment is just that. And a slightly off colored remark is best to be ignored. If a man can't take NO for an answer, is physical, and/or is disrespectful- that's harassment. Just my thinking.
Marcy Padrta
aka The Flight Nun
While flying #1 back in the 80s I was delivering some beverages to the cockpit when the Capt. asked me this question, "Jan have any of us ever said anything to you that could be regarded as sexual harassment? All 3 of the guys were looking at me. I remember so well telling all of them that I was so glad they had asked since I was worried if I had ever said anything to that nature to them. I felt it was a 2-way street..., er..., runway..., er..., sky.
Dear Unknown Reader- Thank you for your comment! You are/were right! It is indeed a 2 way street/sky/runway! Some females forget that! I've heard comments from fellow females that made me cringe! But- in our line of work we heard a Lot of things! Ha!
Marcy Padrta
aka The Flight Nun
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